wfn.org | [PCUSANEWS] Rocky Mountain High NOT!

[PCUSA NEWS <PCUSA.NEWS@ecunet.org>]

Note #7770 from PCUSA NEWS to PRESBYNEWS:

Rocky Mountain High  NOT!
GA03081

Rocky Mountain High  NOT!

Crack-of-dawn event is neither 'run' nor 'fun' but, mercifully, is 'done'

by Jerry L. Van Marter

DENVER, May 28 - They say sunrise in the Rockies is beautiful. I'll take
their word for it.

I was grateful for the tinted windows of the dawn's-early-light cab as I and
my companions took to the Board of Pensions' eighth annual 5K "fun" 
run/walk/roll/stagger.

	I admired our cabbie's kindness, if not his gift of premonition - he
dropped us off at City Park, site of this year's "race," right in front of
the EMS ambulance. I'm a little too old to object to such obvious kindnesses.

	For the second year, my 11-year-old son, Luke, and my spouse, Eva
(Stimson, editor of Presbyterians Today) joined me in my preposterous crusade
to prove that I've still got "it." These days I barely recall what "it" is. 
The three of us collectively personified the old saw: Eva was ready. Luke was
willing. I hoped to be able.

	In the past I have occasionally accused Judy Freyer, the Board of
Pensions' investment whiz, of paying more attention to the market-price
"crawler" on her Palm Pilot than to the race.  This has never been true.

	Before this year's race, she stomped up, whipped out her Palm Pilot,
waved it in my face, and thundered: "Here! This year you won't be libeling
me!"

	(Later, I would see Judy and Dennis Murphy, her equally whizzerific
counterpart from the Presbyterian Foundation, deep in conversation as they
ambled across the finish line near the back of the pack. (I would see them
from behind.)

	I don't know about you, but I'm GLAD those two pay more attention to
their Palm Pilots than to a humiliating exercise in futility such as the BOP
"fun run."

	Also at the starting line was Corey Schlosser-Hall, the new
communications director for Seattle Presbytery, a strapping young fellow. One
glance at him, decked out in REAL running garb (purple; Go Huskies!), and I
lowered my already modest expectations for the "race."

	Corey was also sporting a Japanese hieroglyphic tattoo on his
shoulder.  Somebody asked, "What's the tattoo mean, Corey?" Projecting my own
anxiety, I responded: "It's a do-not-resuscitate order."

	As for the race, I blame my less-than-stellar result on the goose
poop. The course wended its way around a very scenic lake, replete with
feathered friends, and with survival my primary concern, I may have been
over-cautious in avoiding this natural hazard. This, and making sure Luke
wouldn't get lost - the light was dim (behind the four pairs of sunglasses I
wore to cut down on the early-morning sun's glare) - explains my tardy
finish.

	Luke insists he beat me last year. Not true! It was a dead heat (so
to speak).

	This year, sorry to say, it was no contest. My finishing kick only
finished me.

	At the conclusion of this year's event, certificates were handed out
to those who have participated in five or more of these worthy though
ridiculously early annual promotions of healthy exercise.

	Bernellyn Carey, who organizes the event each year, compassionately
laid my certificate on the ground, where I could easily reach out and clutch
it to my heaving chest.

	God - and the Board of Pensions - willing, I'll be back next year in
Richmond for "fun run" No.9  - at the crack of dawn, no doubt.

	Come join us!

*** For instructions on using this system (including how to UNJOIN this
meeting), send e-mail to mailrequests@ecunet.org
------------------------------------------
Send your response to this article to pcusa.news@pcusa.org

------------------------------------------
To unsubscribe from this mailing list, send an 'unsubscribe' request to

pcusanews-request@halak.pcusa.org