wfn.org | UMNS# 04583-Marriage is Better the Second Time Around

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Marriage is Better the Second Time Around 

Dec. 9, 2004	 News media contact:   Matt  Carlisle * (615) 742-5470* 
Nashville {04583}

NOTE: This story is a sidebar to UMNS #582. The main story and related
materials are available online at http://www.umc.org.

By Susan Passi-Klaus

(UMCom) -- It took divorce for Anthony and Mitchie Stewart to discover that
giving up on their marriage was a mistake.

The couple divorced in 2000 after almost 10 years of marriage. Why? Because
Anthony, then 38, put his career and social life ahead of his family.

"I thought that providing for my family was enough," he says. "We had a nice
house; there was food on the table. That's what my father did and I thought
it was what I was supposed to do." 

Mitchie, now 41, says she had had enough. "What was the point of being
married if he was never there and didn't have time for us?"

Anthony had never imagined himself divorced. In fact, he considered himself a
family man, so he protested, but in the end gave Mitchie the divorce she
thought she wanted. However, he never stopped praying they'd get back
together.

Four years after the divorce, both had nagging feelings that maybe they
hadn't tried hard enough to make their marriage work.

Despite his engagement to another woman, Anthony found himself on his knees
asking God if he was doing the right thing. The answer he got was, "You made
a covenant with Mitchie and you need to keep it."

Mitchie was also engaged, but her own second thoughts led her to call off the
wedding. One day, out of the blue, she confessed to Anthony, "I blew it. I
just blew it. I'm sorry I put you through it. I was just too impatient to try
and make it work."

The Stewarts, who attend Bethel AME Church in Tallahassee, Fla., decided they
wouldn't retie the knot before participating in PAIRS, a marriage enrichment
program offered through "Live The Life Ministries" at Killearn United
Methodist Church. 

"It taught us the tools for communication that made us more sensitive to each
other's needs," Mitchie says.

On Feb. 14, 2004, they took their vows again - this time paying extra
attention to the words.

"There was a sweet, sweet spirit in that chapel." Anthony says. "Now we know
what's outside the walls of this marriage, and we don't want it."

Susan Passi-Klaus is a freelance writer living in Nashville, Tenn. and of
publisher "Cracked Pots," an inspirational newsletter for women.

News media contact: Matt Carlisle, Nashville, Tenn., (615) 742-5153 or
newsdesk@umcom.org. 

This feature story was developed by UMC.org, the official online ministry of
The United Methodist Church.

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United Methodist News Service