wfn.org | Working toward reconciliation

[BethAH <BethAH@mbm.org>]

May 30, 2001
Beth Hawn
Mennonite Board of Missions
(219) 294-7523
<NEWS@MBM.org>

May 30, 2001

Working toward reconciliation: MVSer assists VORP program

Grant Rissler is serving through Mennonite Voluntary Service as a
writer and photographer.  After spending a year as intern at the
Mennonite Central Committee United Nations office in Manhattan,
he is traveling for five months by bus to 20 other MVS and
Short-Term Mission sites, gathering the stories and experiences
of other volunteers and communities.  A weekly column by Grant
can be found on the web at www.MBM.org.

BOULDER, Colo. (CHM/MBM)  Winning is what makes victim-offender
reconciliation programs (VORP) worth the effort.  Having both
sides win, that is.

Where theres more than just a handshake, where theres a higher
connection  when its a struggle and [reconciliation] comes out
on top, that make[s] it seem worth the effort, said  Sarah
Kingsley, a program coordinator and Mennonite Voluntary Service
volunteer for the Boulder, Colo., VORP agency.

As program coordinator, Kingsley fills numerous roles, from
managing and overseeing reconciliation cases to teaching classes
on accountability to office administration.  But being part of a
process that allows both sides to make a broken situation better
is at the heart of the matter, and its the ultimate motivation
of mediators.

In this job, Kingsley says, you get to help people see that they
did have a choice (in a conflict), help victims see that they can
impact the outcome, which is something that is void in the
courts.  Thats the heart of mediation:  What can we do [to
resolve an offense] beyond a fine for an action?

To illustrate this, Kingsley recalls one of the most moving
mediation efforts she helped to coordinate.  The case involved a
Brazilian foreign exchange student who accidentally stepped on
the accelerator instead of the brakes as he pulled into a
restaurant parking lot, killing a young Korean man.

Originally, the Korean family contracted a relative to sue the
mother of the Brazilian teenager for monetary damages.  As time
passed, however, the family felt strongly that punitive damages
were not an answer and sought out another alternative for
reconciliation, eventually working through VORP.  The result,
Kingsley said, was that both the grieving family and the
remorseful teenager were blessed.

Somehow, [for the family] to just sit with him and say, What
can you tell us? and to hear this honest remorse  it was
incredible.

The family, she said, didnt want to see two lives lost in the
accident, and wanted the Brazilian to use that experience to do
good in his life.  So as part of the reconciliation, they agreed
that he would write a letter each year to the Korean family
explaining how he was using his life.

Of course, Kingsley said, the family still grieves, but now
they have a channel to see something positive happen instead of
it just being a terrible, terrible situation.  Thats the heart
of reconciliation.  Its not about money, its not about repaying
the debts; its about understanding and compassion and having
everyones needs heard.

Kingsley said there are many other instances of VORP succeeding
in reconciling victims and offenders where the traditional legal
system has failed.

And once people go through the VORP process and reach an
agreement on what actions should be taken by the parties, VORP
has a 100-percent rate of people following through, as opposed to
a rate of 56 percent in the courts.

Part of what makes that possible, she said, is the
face-to-face accountability.  Once theyve met with the person,
theres that face for them.  Theres a different type of
obligation.

Mennonite Voluntary Service is a joint program of the Commission
on Home Ministries of the General Conference Mennonite Church and
Mennonite Board of Missions of the Mennonite Church.
* * *
Grant E. Rissler       PHOTO AVAILABLE